How to Be More Assertive: 7 Tips

How to Be More Assertive: 7 Tips

Comments (100)

  1. Now what can i do to people who cannot wait? They want their needs to be met right here right now. I end up feeling stressed and my bp goes up from being overwhelmed. If i talk back maybe they will report me to the boss…i mean i am a human not a machine!

  2. As a teacher/instructor, being assertive can be one of the hardest things to do. Because you’re entire position is based on giving to students and letting them take (information, time, knowledge ect). Any tips for tough situations specifically pertaining to that position?

  3. Its very hard to be assertive when your too nice. You feel bad when your assertive, even though one shouldn't.

  4. This is an area that I'm growing in tremendously. Just a bit of advice for anyone else struggling with assertiveness, don't beat yourself over the head and get down and out over missing the mark. Because it takes time and patience to develop new habits, so a bit of oscillation is normal. But what I do when I know I should have been assertive is replay the event until I'm satisfied with a proper response that I should have said or did. So in the future, I'll be ready.

  5. Assertive=Attraction+Attention+Attentiveness+Attitude+Confidence/Joy!

  6. Don't like. Too soft not assertive enough , to me…

  7. I give a fuck about the ad get into he fucking video or I'd dislike

  8. He looks like Chris Pine and Leonardo DiCaprio

  9. That policy one is really clever. If it sounds legit no one will question it.

  10. Enjoy listening to you talk, thanks for the vid

  11. Try just saying, "No," and don't explain yourself. People just don't seem to know what to do with that, and they'll be much less likely to try and take advantage of your kindness again.


  13. Lol I came here because my astrological birth chart is dominant in Aries but I’m far from being assertive… thank you for this ✨

  14. everyone shows their worse when you give them too much space

  15. This is a great video, but I felt your face was uncomfortably close to the camera.

  16. first 1.50 is crap.

  17. I'm not very assertive cause of reasons and coming out to my dad as trans I knew he'd say no your not Iso I pre planned the reply that he doesn't know my mind and it's really not him whose gonna suffer if I do nothing.

  18. It is good to be assertive. We should speak up if we cannot do something. Otherwise other people will step all over us and we will suffer in silence.

  19. Can you do a video on how to be assertive in the work place?

  20. Can you do a video on being more assertive in the work place? Also thank I believe part of being a man is being assertive. Something I personally need more work on.

  21. Wow thanks I really did not realize I was making this mistake

  22. Fantastic video. Really helpful

  23. I understand your point. You are trying to make the situation more positive in nature. Don't you know that we have already tried all the 48 power tools to win these situations and it didn't work. The construct of this world is not with the manner in mind. Everything is built from the powerful to the powerless. Look at the world, everything is arrogance in nature. We even invented nukes to level the field to manufacture morality. Don't you know we already failed time and time again! As long as the operating field is not leveled (greed, jealousy, evil, and deception) up the conflict continues. Don't forget the Machiavellianism.

  24. Wow just discovered you. Loved this video…!!!
    I deffinetly need to work on keep my tone calmed. Ive done everything else but without being calmed it doesn't work at all.

  25. How to be assertive in a way that others don't think you are being aggressive?

  26. Very good. Thanks!

  27. Looks like an older Chris Pine

  28. I started a new job 6 months ago. I was bubbly, active, happy and energetic. My boss is always nagging at me but it's not what she says it's how she says it. We have 3 shops in different parts of the country. I'm doing my ultimate best and our manager dropped out 2 months ago and I was thrown into the deep end and with no training. My boss called me thick as in stupid and not to my face. She said it to one of the other employees in another shop. I had to hear this from someone in another shop and I couldn't fend my self. 😢 deeply hurt and upset. If I am smiling when the boss comes to the shop she says what the joke "come on what's the joke" . Nothing. I'm just smiling. But now I'm broke. Feel sick and nervous when the boss rings. I'm not sleeping. My head is reeling and I'm crying all the time. I love the job passionately but I'm weak and so broken. 😢😢😢 I have no one to turn to.

  29. Thank you great advice.

  30. This is interesting… I didn't really think I was assertive at all, but listening to these pointers I am actually pretty assertive – most of this learnt through dealing with customers naturally, I guess it is because it's really good for getting lots of experience with conversating.

  31. Hey I was a woman watching your video and this should not be restricted to men only tips

  32. God I have never been a hoe and I will never be a hoe. I hate these people. I have no fucking Independence. I definitely mean to be rude and disrespectful, but am way too kind. Where am I??????? Am autistic and am not allowed to go anywhere meaningful.

  33. My narcissistic mother brought me here…

  34. Starts @ 1.50…

  35. I think im too straight forward and blunt that people don't even ask me to help.

  36. Key to assertiveness is recognizing false modesty as an injustice to all whom you meet

  37. I enjoyed your video.

  38. Fantastic short, sharp techniques and examples. It helped me understand that assertiveness is not about being forceful, but by effectively communicate your needs and look atvwin/win situations to get what you ultimately want. Great!

  39. glad for this vid

    all the other ones are just
    "hOw tO bE AgReSsiVe"
    or dick things like that

  40. Needed this…..i'm too nice. Life is unfortunately making this out of me

  41. Assertiveness is an excellent skill both for managing your relationship with others and managing your relationship with yourself. It is a key to better and quicker decision making and faster and more productive actions.


    When you are assertive, you are self-assured and draw power from this to get your point across firmly. It is not easy to become more assertive, but it is possible. Am I right?

  42. Very good stuff.

  43. The dude is kinda boring

  44. So many minutes, so little content..

  45. Great one, loved it thank you!

  46. Do you have any suggestions how to think faster?  I often come up with the winning arguments 5 minutes late.

  47. I struggle with being assertive,people think of me as too nice and a push over. I feel like crap when I try to be assertive.
    One thing I have learnt is to have an calm equal toned voice.Don't start shouting,or cussing, as it gets you nowhere,and makes you feel even worse.And you lose out by not getting your point across


  49. This was a very inspiring and enjoyable video to watch! Points were well defined. Overall video was direct and and non offensive (just like the subject matter at hand).

  50. So good looking my god

  51. Helpful video! I’ve always struggled with being assertive and knowing my worth.

  52. Bunch of obvious reasons

  53. I'm afraid of retaliation. I stood up for myself at work and got the silent treatment and I'm afraid it could escalate

  54. No matter how calmly you ask for a discount on something in a customer service interaction, unless they've really inconvenienced you, you're probably still being an asshole. Like there's almost never an excuse to ask for a discount on something just because you're buying it and don't like how much it costs, if the store/company didn't mislead you on price.

  55. This is very helpful. I am trying to work on not being too nice and not being aggressive. May struggle is to not be verbally aggressive when I feel that someone has been deliberate and malicious in running over clearly stated boundaries.

  56. This is only for gentlemen? Not ladies too? 🙁

  57. I use to be the type that always was a pushover and a "yes" person. To the point that I started realizing that people werent respecting me. You can be nice but still be assertive. I find that it all boils down to how you present yourself overall. If people feel they can get over on you, then they will. But if you from the beginning, come to the table meaning what you say then you will be taken seriously.

  58. Thought this was Chris Pine for a second lol

  59. Thanks for the info. Though I feel like this video could have been 6 minutes.

  60. is no one gonna bring up the fact he unnecessarily directed this advice towards men?

  61. My other big problem is that I know when to speak up but I just hate to break the beat of the music. Maybe the rest of the discussion isn't completely rotten, and I'd hate to rock the boat on one or two (very important) points. What do you do in those situations?

  62. Is he wearing concealer?!😧

  63. For me it's disrespectful mannerisms from people that gets me mad or bad etiquette

  64. Love your approach in setting ground rules for the future while still remaining flexible, available, respectful and approachable. Great tips, cheers!

  65. Why did you end it "with thanks for watching "gentlemen" ?

  66. I have developed a policy of:
    1. Not letting people borrow my tools
    2. Not helping people move
    3. Not working on other peoples stuff

  67. if ryan reynolds and chris pine had a kid

  68. I was kind of assertive today (I think) and now I'm fighting the worst anxiety 😂😥 I was at the deli counter and there was no tickets being called so I had a bunch of people push Infront of me I just smiled and waited too anxious to say "hey I was here first!" Anyways I finally get called and this lady confronted me and said she was next…the worker stood up for me and said I was here for a while she demanded to see my ticket (they just started calling numbers as a large influx of customers had lined up) I firmly told her I had been standing there for quite a while and I was infact next…I felt proud for a second and now I feel terrible for not just being quiet and letting her go before me 😫😅

  69. A coworker wouldn’t admit he’s going skiing. He’d call in sick instead. At least at my workplace. Then the coworker who gets hit with double the work can’t lay on the guilt trip or hold the colleague responsible for not giving enough notice.

  70. At times he looks like Chris Pine.

  71. Good video but try not to be over theatrical.

  72. I really enjoyed this video but I am a little offended that you suggest it’s only for men

  73. Are you still commandeering the USS Enterprise?

  74. I can definitely relate to this situation because I have a hard time telling people no. Thanks for making this video!

  75. Great video, but it might help widen your viewership if you addressed your videos to everyone rather than just to men (11:07).

  76. I don’t know why this is only aimed at men! I’m a women and found it really helpful! Nice video 🙂

  77. those who thumbs down 94 times are a bunch of dumbasses. grow up morons.

  78. How to be assertive??

    Stop watching YouTube videos telling you how to be assertive…

  79. Please add more examples.

  80. are your elated to chris pine?

  81. Very helpful video thank you Chris Pine 😉

  82. I'm a social bird and I thought I knew it, but, point #2#3#5 were all helpful. Thank you man.

  83. All I do is think about other people’s needs

  84. I let others be assertive and respond to them with maddening passive aggression.

  85. Hi Kyle. You're an amazing human being if you can respond like that in most situations. 😊 My hero!

  86. If you don't speak up you're screwed because you lose value and feel bad in the long run, if you do speak up you're screwed because you're difficult and people (both their allies and others) support and defend the person who stepped over your boundaries.

  87. This is so important to me. It's not that I'm nice, it's that I'm too scared. I have some subconscious fears surrounding standing up for myself.

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